Memories
by Nanashichan
Summary: Just a little angst fic involving 1x2 with a happy ending so don't worry. Enjoy.


Memories  
  
  
  
Ok, Gundam Wing is not mine and the only warnings are 1x2 and angst but there is a happy ending so enjoy and please review.  
  
  
  
Memories  
  
  
  
I entered the room grinning cheerfully, slamming the door behind me as I bounced over to my bed. "Oi, Heero? Ya in here?"  
  
With no answer from the bathroom, I finally allow my masks to fall, revealing the sorrow and pain that I hide from the other pilots.  
  
Solemn now, I reached under my bed to pull out an old, beaten cardboard box. Unconsciously, my fingertips lightly caressed the top before carefully removing the lid and pulling out several photos and odd objects. Sifting through the various items, my gaze landed on a tattered picture of a little boy standing next to an old priest. The young boy was smiling happily up at the aged man who returned the child's look with a hint of caring in his brown eyes.  
  
Pushing back the tears that threatened to fall, I stared at the picture for a few moments before replacing it in the box and returning it under my bed.  
  
* * * * *  
  
You were once my companion,  
  
You were all that mattered.  
  
You were once a friend and a father,  
  
Then my world was shattered.  
  
* * * * *  
  
Tossing and turning, my dreams were filled with thoughts of the destruction of Maxwell Church. Last images of the rubble that covered the many bodies of the people that I once loved and called family occupied my nightmares.  
  
* * * * *  
  
Wishing you were somehow here again,  
  
Wishing you were somehow near.  
  
Sometimes it seemed if I just dreamed  
  
Somehow you could be here.  
  
* * * * *  
  
Sister Helen's last words echoed through my ears, filling my eyes with tears as I tried so hard to block out the pain and emptiness.  
  
"You're Maxwell's little angel."  
  
//How can you call me that when I was the bringer of death to you and all the others that I loved?// I screamed as I awoke, panting and sweating.  
  
The figure next to me stirred slightly and tightened their embrace around my waist. "Sleep Duo. I'm here."  
  
Feeling a little bit of relief and comfort wash over me, I slipped again into the waiting darkness.  
  
* * * * *  
  
Wishing I could hear your voice again.  
  
* * * * *  
  
It was another mission ending in only tears and sorrow. I had been the one assigned to detonate the base, therefore putting more lives on my conscience. More lives that I was responsible for destroying.  
  
//Was this really going to be worth it in the end, or will I die going down in history as the killer of innocents? Did I really have a home in this world where I could be accepted for what I have done?//  
  
I closed my eyes as I leaned against the leg of Deathscythe, alone again in the midst of the woods of my guilt.  
  
* * * * *  
  
Knowing that I never would.  
  
Dreaming of you won't help me to do  
  
All that you dreamed I could.  
  
* * * * *  
  
My mission had led Deathscythe and I to an old town in England. From reports it had not changed in style since the early twentieth century.  
  
One of the first things that crossed my mind was to scout the city, not only out of habit, but also to surround myself with normalcy that I craved yet knew I could never have.  
  
I didn't realize were I had taken myself until a familiar scent surrounded me. Breaking out of my daze, my gaze swept over the stained glass windows and beautiful sculptures of angels. Their faces were alive with emotion but they could never feel the coldness of the world and the cruelty that only human kind can bring to themselves and others.  
  
* * * * *  
  
Passing the bells and sculpted angels,  
  
Cold and monumental,  
  
Seem for you the wrong companions.  
  
You were warm and gentle.  
  
* * * * *  
  
Claiming a seat toward the back of the church, I observed the sermon quietly as tears welled up in my eyes.  
  
* * * * *  
  
Too many years fighting back tears.  
  
Why can't the past just die?  
  
* * * * *  
  
Images of Father Maxwell reading stories from the bible and Sister Helen singing hymns replaced the figures in the church to once again remind me of my past.  
  
* * * * *  
  
Wishing you were somehow here again,  
  
Knowing we must say goodbye.  
  
Try to forgive, teach me to live,  
  
Give me the strength to try!  
  
* * * * *  
  
Shaking my head slightly and wiping the moisture away from my face, I stared emptily at the priest. A hand shook me out of my stupor, bringing my focus back to the real world. "Heero? What are you doing here?"  
  
Heero shook his head and extended his hand for me to take. "Let's go home, koi."  
  
I'm sure my face showed shock before a soft and loving expression passed through my gaze. "Yes. Let's go home."  
  
* * * * *  
  
No more memories.  
  
No more silent tears  
  
No more gazing across the wasted years.  
  
Help me say goodbye.  
  
  
  
Owari 


End file.
